Older and wiser?
Another post about self-introspection.
I know some people feel like growing older is a scary thing. While I agree that it is scary in a way that time is passing by so quickly when I still have so many things I want to see/do/try, I do feel like growing older has brought a lot more positives with it than negatives.
I think teenage years are filled with angst for a lot of us. I had a pretty good childhood compared to so many others, but I don't have many fond memories of being in my teens. Acne prone skin (which still hasn't changed, ugh!), awkward body, immature mind - don't miss any of it! I did not really know myself and felt very inadequate. Those were not happy times for sure!
My twenties were a turning point for me. I moved to the United States at age 21. It was the change I so needed. Moving away from family and everything that I knew was hard beyond words, but thinking back about it, it was the best decision I could have made for myself! I cannot say enough about the rewards of getting a fresh start, in a new environment. This move helped shape me into who I am today.
Those were formative years for me in more ways than one. I went to grad school, found a job while still in school, and graduated with honors. I met and got married to my husband when I was in my twenties and also had my first child during that time. I gained more confidence in myself. My husband played a huge part in this, supporting me in everything that I wanted to do. Being in a country where "failure" is not treated as an end-all, but more as a reason to try again; where originality is rewarded and self-expression is encouraged - that was a huge game changer for me. I feel like though I am an Indian by birth, and still value the Indian culture and a lot of what that brings with it, I really "grew up" in the U.S.A. and am immensely grateful to this country for letting me develop into the person that I wanted to be.
Having said all that, my twenties were still not all great. I was still insecure. I felt like I had to "please" everyone. I was afraid to speak up and state my opinion in the fear of what others would think of me. I was still not sure of my strengths, whereas I knew my flaws and viewed them as insurmountable problems. I took things a lot more personally than I should have.
Now that I am in my thirties, I finally feel like I have come into my own. I know my strengths and celebrate them. I am still aware of my weaknesses, but now I also know how to work around them and use them to my advantage when I can. I feel confident enough in my opinions to share them with others. While I do appreciate when others agree with what I have to say, I also know that having people disagree with me is not a blemish on my "record". I value what my friends and family have to say to me, but my life's decisions are not solely based on others' opinions and what pleases others. I feel more empowered as I have gotten older.
Don't get me wrong, I still have my "crazy" moments, my family can attest to that. And I still have some of the same struggles as in the previous decade of my life but to a much lesser degree. Growing older also comes with its own problems, but overall, I seem to have burst through the "clouds" that surrounded my "youth".
I know that the journey of self-discovery never ends, and I am looking forward to continuing on that journey with the maturity and self-awareness that comes with age. Though I still have a couple of years till I hit my next decade, here's hoping that my forties beat my thirties in what I learn and gain from them! Like a fine wine, I hope to keep getting better with age, (in my own mind at least)! <fingers crossed>
I know some people feel like growing older is a scary thing. While I agree that it is scary in a way that time is passing by so quickly when I still have so many things I want to see/do/try, I do feel like growing older has brought a lot more positives with it than negatives.
I think teenage years are filled with angst for a lot of us. I had a pretty good childhood compared to so many others, but I don't have many fond memories of being in my teens. Acne prone skin (which still hasn't changed, ugh!), awkward body, immature mind - don't miss any of it! I did not really know myself and felt very inadequate. Those were not happy times for sure!
My twenties were a turning point for me. I moved to the United States at age 21. It was the change I so needed. Moving away from family and everything that I knew was hard beyond words, but thinking back about it, it was the best decision I could have made for myself! I cannot say enough about the rewards of getting a fresh start, in a new environment. This move helped shape me into who I am today.
Those were formative years for me in more ways than one. I went to grad school, found a job while still in school, and graduated with honors. I met and got married to my husband when I was in my twenties and also had my first child during that time. I gained more confidence in myself. My husband played a huge part in this, supporting me in everything that I wanted to do. Being in a country where "failure" is not treated as an end-all, but more as a reason to try again; where originality is rewarded and self-expression is encouraged - that was a huge game changer for me. I feel like though I am an Indian by birth, and still value the Indian culture and a lot of what that brings with it, I really "grew up" in the U.S.A. and am immensely grateful to this country for letting me develop into the person that I wanted to be.
Having said all that, my twenties were still not all great. I was still insecure. I felt like I had to "please" everyone. I was afraid to speak up and state my opinion in the fear of what others would think of me. I was still not sure of my strengths, whereas I knew my flaws and viewed them as insurmountable problems. I took things a lot more personally than I should have.
Now that I am in my thirties, I finally feel like I have come into my own. I know my strengths and celebrate them. I am still aware of my weaknesses, but now I also know how to work around them and use them to my advantage when I can. I feel confident enough in my opinions to share them with others. While I do appreciate when others agree with what I have to say, I also know that having people disagree with me is not a blemish on my "record". I value what my friends and family have to say to me, but my life's decisions are not solely based on others' opinions and what pleases others. I feel more empowered as I have gotten older.
Don't get me wrong, I still have my "crazy" moments, my family can attest to that. And I still have some of the same struggles as in the previous decade of my life but to a much lesser degree. Growing older also comes with its own problems, but overall, I seem to have burst through the "clouds" that surrounded my "youth".
I know that the journey of self-discovery never ends, and I am looking forward to continuing on that journey with the maturity and self-awareness that comes with age. Though I still have a couple of years till I hit my next decade, here's hoping that my forties beat my thirties in what I learn and gain from them! Like a fine wine, I hope to keep getting better with age, (in my own mind at least)! <fingers crossed>
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